Monday, December 21, 2009
I’m sure you have all seen the movie, or at least read the book He's Not That Into You,(if you haven’t you have to, NOW!!!) If every girl lived her life according to this book we would all find our Mr. Rights and our Prince Charming with little to no problems. But unfortunately girls, we don't.
The movie starts out at a playground, a precious little girl is building a sandcastle and a boy starts walking her way. She gives a flirty smile, surprised the boy is approaching her. The boy then pushes her down, telling her she smells like dog poo, that she is so stupid, just like dog poo, and that she is made out of poo… She runs to her mom, tears streaming down her face, to tell what the little boy had done. And then... her mom says, "Awww, honey, do you know why that little boy did those things, and said those things," she smiles as her daughter shakes her head no, "It’s because he likes you!" The girl looks surprised, and confused, as the narrator says "And there it is... That’s the beginning of our problem." The mom tells her daughter "That little boy is doing those terrible things because he has a crush on you." "Do you know what this means, were all encouraged, no, programmed, to believe that if a guy acts like a total jerk, that means he likes you." says the narrator.
Then the movie shows a series of scenes of women, all over the world, giving excuses for guys... There is a scene of a girl telling her upset friend "Here's the problem, he likes you too much. You're too pretty and too awesome. He can't handle it." A girl waits by the phone while her friend comforts her saying "That Phi Delt obviously liked you, he must've just lost your number." After that, two coworkers discuss a man, one of the ladies tells the other "He’s not asking you out cause he is intimidated by your professional success." The next is a scene, where two Asian girls walk out of the mall as one explains to the other, "He's not asking you out because he's scared of your emotional maturity." Two middle aged women are taking a walk, one tells her workout buddy, "He's not asking you out because he just got out of a serious relationship." Followed by a scene of one military girl saying to the other "trust me it’s because he never had a serious relationship." The next is all the way in Africa, there are three women and one of the women tells the other "I'm sure he just forgot your hut number, or was eating by a lion," it comforts the girl and she smiles telling her friends how awesome they are.
What is wrong with us? Why do we make all these excuses for guys across the world? Why can't we tell our friends... HES JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU!!! You all know what I'm talking about. We've all been there. Our friend is upset wondering why that wonderful guy she met last night hasn't called her, or why her boyfriend is ignoring her, or why Jack from 3rd period won't ask her out. We KNOW the answer. We KNOW why. For some reason, he does NOT like her. Wouldn't it be easier just to tell our friend, look he doesn't like you. at all. move on. Than to try to think of every explanation in the book, as to why he is not acting right.
And it gets even worse with ourselves. I am guessing I am not the only one who has checked my phone a billion times to see if "he" called. Then you check to see if somehow your phone magically got turned on silent.. and then you the turn the volume on loud, oh wait, it already was. Then you think crap, I did give him the right number, right? I mean my number and my mom’s number are sort of the same they both start with 399 and you were so nervous talking to him, so that could be a possibility... ya know, that’s probably what happened. So you go ask mom… has anyone called you asking for me? Nope. Then you wait and you wait. He never calls. But he said he would? Look at how much time we just wasted, waiting. Waiting for a guy that never even liked us in the first place.
Ya know, we just don't take rejection very well. We don't wanna believe that he just doesn't like us. And why would we want to make that guy, that doesn't like us already, like us? We don't need him. What.. we’re gonna force him to like us? He's just settling if he does. and honestly so are we. We need to stop.
I am recently single. And you better believe that 1st guy that is 15 minutes late on a date, I’m out of there. The guy that says he’s gonna call Wednesday night but doesn’t until Friday, GOODBYE. The one that works his charm on me, then I see him later flirting with Betsy big boobs, Hasta La Vista, baby! Even if it was BRAD PITT that cheats on me, TaTa!! Nice knowing ya, buddy! (okay, maybe not if it was Brad Pitt, I’d probably let it slip, but you get my drift.)
Girls, we are so much better than that! We have let guys push around for years! And we are letting them get away with it. We are giving them our heart and saying “Be careful with it, its fragile.” Then we watch them stomp on it, rip it to pieces, light it on fire, then pee on it to put it out, then we pick it up and hand it right back to them! And I’m not just preaching to ya’ll, I’ve done it too! Multiple times! Don’t we know we deserve better?
I think if we all agree that we will stop putting up with all the crap, we won’t let these jerks get to us, even if he has baby blue eyes, and washboard abs, that we could really start something new, where we as women were actually valued by men. Maybe then we could all stop playing “the game,” and just fall head over heels for a guy and he do the same for us!
And ALWAYS remember. Don’t make excuses. They aren’t into you. And you’re better than that! So don’t even think twice about him. On to the next, maybe the next one will be The One?!